Exposure

Opening up…

How dare I take the risk?

Cracks in the wall…

I’ll never let you through them.
I tried to open my heart and mind before.
But you never listened, just shut and dead bolted the door
Shutting out my thoughts,
Causing unknown depths of hurt.
My pain is only half of it all.
‘Who’s going to hear my voice?’ was my cry.
Nobody! So I put up walls.
Don’t want to go down that road.
Tired of opening myself, receiving nothing in return.
I was raised to suck it up, not show weakness.
When I tried the opposite, the reaction was nonsense.
My voice goes unheard,
Kept locked inside.
The only responses are echoes,
Ricocheting off the walls that have been erected,
Causing cracks created from being tested.

The cycle continues.
You want me to be open.
I follow suit but you don’t know how to take it,
Because you’ve never experienced one doing that before.
I get frustrated from the result, not wanting to give you anything.
What you want, it sounds good in theory.
But when it comes out, you become contradictory.
What am I to do?

How can I get through to you?

Can’t give you the key to the door.

Too scared of being disclosed.